How High Is Your Mountain?

(© Grace Lee, www.cutecolors.com)

One of the things not immediately apparent from this blog is that I am a procrastinator from way back, most noticeably when it comes to study. I study a well-respected writing course externally, posting in my assignments each week and setting my own schedule. When I first began this course four years ago, it was the only way I was able to do it - I had three small children. Over the years, I've had fits and spurts of creativity but (thankfully) have managed to complete everything at around an A- average. It took me a whole year to realise that anything under an A wasn't an indication of failure, LOL, but since then I've been content with simply handing things in and passing.

This year though, I've struggled. The lack of in-classroom accountability has truly come around to nip me in the rear and I've been behind (like several assignments behind) for most of the year. I have several 'needed to be done yesterday' type of deadlines hanging over my head at the moment and it has become apparent in recent weeks how badly that flows on to all the other parts of my life at home.

I thought I would easily be able to 'switch off' when it came time to sit down and study. Not so. The many distractions at home far outweigh the ability to study in my pyjamas, unfortunately! So I've been jumping on the bus to the library a lot lately, but in doing so I'm neglecting all of my responsibilities within the home. Even when I study at home, I feel so guilty that I'm not doing laundry, or prepping for dinner, or working on the embroidery I started great-guns three weeks ago and haven't picked up since. When I put aside catch-up study time in favour or housework, I feel worse knowing my missed deadlines are getting further and further away. When I pick up the books, the house suffers.

I'll be glad come December 1st. Sigh.

My course, all four stressful years of it, finally wraps up in the last week of November. And while I've loved the creative side (a little glimpse into a world beyond home and family, but potentially still a job I can do from home later), the scheduling has just about killed me. Especially this year.

But this morning, some good news. I sat down and ran up a study calendar for the months of September, October and November. I plugged in posting dates for all my assignments (self-made, given the real deadlines are long gone!) and was surprised to find that the biggest stumbling block was a particularly niggly thorn-in-my-side assignment carried over from last semester. Two solid days of effort (albeit tear-inducing, hair-ripping, exhaustion-producing effort) will see that sent on its merry way. Eight other assignments are what I term 'fluff' assignments - half the workload of a regular assignment. And there's one really big project that I need to chase up more information on. But according to the study calendar I made up this morning, I'll have finished all but this really big project by early October. Leaving two solid months to devote to it.

Sometimes we get so stressed out about a particularly daunting task that we fail to see the end result. Sure, the next month will be hard, scheduling-wise. But not impossible. I made my bed, and now I have to lie in it, LOL! But my point is that I had been putting off launching into all of this catch-up work because the mountain seemed insurmountable. I wasn't snowed under. I was just allowing my heart rule over my head.

Is there something that you have been putting off lately? I bet its not as bad as you think!

Cheers,
Lizzie